Holla!

Oooh busy times.

Hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas, as much as I did!

Much love.

CH-Ch-Changes

My struggles come as if the world is crashing down on me because I've been living in my own comfort for too long. What is weird about an ache is you don't know the source. Like a cut or a bruise, there could have been a fall, a stumble or a missed step. In life, there may be a parent, brother/sister, enemy or untrue friend who causes pain. I do admit of a deep ache I feel that constantly reminds me of how lonely I am. There's only one person outside my family that I've ever fully trusted with my heart. I no longer belong to this one person, nor does he belong to me. As far as I know, the ache just has to fade... or better yet... BE REPLACED. (Yes, I had to type it in screaming bold letters!) I long for a new sense of connection and belonging to overwhelm me and I have stepped out to do my part. There is this person I really like now, so I just might as well, ya, step out.

Exposed. Brought to light. Uncovered. Vulnerable.
Go big. Go deep.
And sing!
Heartbeat racing? Use it.
Feel the rhythm? Play it.
Go louder and stronger.
Fill the room.
...and ENJOY.

Hard to regain myself at times with my problems, my issues, my mistakes, the ways they do not know me, the parts they may not accept of me, their disloyalty... How can I trust them? I'm usually only afraid. It's like you can't breathe. It's like you can't see. It's like you can't find anything to hold on to. It's sad how people are constantly coming and going, but it's also amazing how there could be a person who comes in to change your life a little bit into something more beautiful.

It's like finding freedom. I thank YOU. I think of you now with a smile on my face and funny feelings I still cannot comprehend.

A song that knocks me out

This one is called Come On Get Higher by Matt Nathanson...

I miss the sound of your voice
I miss the rush of your skin
I miss the still of the silence
As you breathe out and I breathe in
If I could walk on water
If I could tell you what's next
Make you believe
Make you forget

[CHORUS:]
So come on get higher
Loosen my lips
Faith and desire
And the swing of your hips
Just pull me down hard
And drown me in love

[REPEAT CHORUS]

I miss the sound of your voice
The loudest thing in my head
And I ache to remember
All the violent, sweet, perfect words that you said
If I could walk on water
If I could tell you what's next
Make you believe
Make you forget

[REPEAT CHORUS TWICE]

I miss the sound of your voice
I taste the sparks on your tongue
I see angels and devils and God when you come on
Hold on...

Sing sha la la la
Sing sha la la la

[REPEAT CHORUS TWICE]

It's all wrong, it's all wrong
It's all wrong, it's so right

Come on get higher
Come on get higher

Because everything works love
Because everything works in your arms

I shared the lyrics because I have a story in there. One that makes me fly high, but also one that's purely for myself, haha!

And I'm back in the game!

As Leona Lewis' song goes...

"It will all get better in time..."

What can I say? It's just gettin better and better... and better and better... and better!

Livin the time of my life. Yeah baby!